Sexuality

By editor - 14.4 2021

Sex enjoyment is a necessity for the conditioned soul, and sex enjoyment is allowed under the license of marriage ties. According to scriptural injunctions, one is forbidden to engage in sex relationships with any women other than one's wife. All other women are to be considered as one's mother. But in spite of such injunctions, a man is still inclined to have sex relationships with other women. These propensities are to be curbed; otherwise they will be stumbling blocks on the path of selfrealization. As long as the material body is there, the necessities of the material body are allowed, but under rules and regulations.

 

Sex life, intoxication and meateating are general tendencies of human society, but a regulated householder does not indulge in unrestricted sex life and other sense gratification. Marriage on the principles of religious life is therefore current in all civilized human society because that is the way for restricted sex life. This restricted, unattached sex life is also a kind of yajna (sacrifice) because the restricted householder sacrifices his general tendency toward sense gratification for higher, transcendental life.

 

The Vedas prescribe, therefore, sacred marriage for regulated sense gratification. Thereby one is gradually elevated to the platform of release from material bondage, and the highest perfection of liberated life is to associate with the Supreme Lord.

 

He should not indulge in sex outside of married life, for sex is sanctioned in the scripture only in marriage, not otherwise. This is called celibacy.

 

Impatience is due to loss of determination, and loss of determination is due to excessive sex.

 

Marriage means not for sense gratification. Putrayate kriyate bharya, putrapindaprayojanam. To get nice son, that is the idea of marriage. Not for sense gratification.

 

One should practice cleansing oneself externally and internally, and he should learn to become simple in behavior. He should not do anything which is not sanctioned by the scriptural injunctions. He should not indulge in sex outside of married life, for sex is sanctioned in the scripture only in marriage, not otherwise.

 

Sex life should be restricted to persons who are married.

 

Everyone is inclined in this age to eat meat and fish, drink liquor, and indulge in sex life, but according to the Vedic injunctions, sex is allowed only in marriage...

 

Basic principle of material attraction is this sex life. This is general. Those who have organized the sex life in social convention [sic] in so many ways. The marriage is also another convention to give a very finishing nice touch than the animal. That's all. Just like sometimes it is said marriage is legalized prostitution. So for social convention the marriage is a license, but it is also based on the sex life. But for keep up social life, one has to accept some regulative principle. Therefore sex life like animals and sex life in marriage, there is difference. It is better. That is accepted in civilized world.

 

Dam pate rati rati abhiruci hetu maya eva vyavarike. These are the symptoms. Dam pate, husband relationship, husband and wife. Means sex power. We have practically seen in the Western countries, as soon as there is some disturbance in the sex relation of husband and wife, there is divorce. So that, these are the symptoms. Stri te bhunkte ca hi rati viprate sutram eva hi. So man and woman [are] united in marriage relationship simply on sex urge, not on the religious principle. That we have seen.

 

You have asked what is meant by illicit sex. Sex should be used only in marriage for begetting nice children to raise in Krsna Consciousness. Krsna says in the Bhagavadgita that I am sex life performed according to religious principles. Sex life for any other purpose means illicit sex. The use of contraceptive method for sex enjoyment is very sinful.

 

Prabhupada: First of all one has to give up illicit sex life.

Woman Interviewer: Does that include all sex life or...?

Prabhupada: Huh?

Woman Interviewer: What is illicit?

Prabhupada: Illicit sex [is] without marriage, without any relation, sex life, that is illicit sex life.

Woman Interviewer: So sex is allowed in marriage, but not outside.

Prabhupada: That is animal sex life. Just as animals, they have no relationship and have sex life. But human society there is restriction. In every country, in every religion there is a system of marriage. So without marriage, sex life is illicit sex life.

Woman Interviewer: But sex is allowed within marriage.

Prabhupada: Yes, that is...

 

Prabhupada: That is sinful. Don't you see, illicit sex, what havoc it has done?

Mr. Koshi: What exactly do you mean?

Prabhupada: Illicit sex, do you think it is...?

Mr. Koshi: Outside marriage, you mean?

Prabhupada: Yes. Not only outside marriage. Even in marriage, you cannot have sex as you like. You must have sex according to the regulative principle or religious principle.

Mr. Koshi: Could you explain?

Prabhupada: Yes. Just like only for begetting nice children.

Mr. Koshi: For begetting?

Prabhupada: Nice children.

Tamala Krsna: Good children.

Mr. Koshi: What is the meaning of good children?

Prabhupada: Good children means not these rogues and thieves, but one who can understand God. That is good children.

 

Without a fixed wife, a man becomes a debauchee of the first order and is a nuisance in societyunless he is a trained brahmacari, vanaprastha or sannyasi. Unless there is rigid and systematic training of the brahmacari by the expert spiritual master, and unless the student is obedient, it is sure that the socalled brahmacari will fall prey to the attack of sex. There are so many instances of falldown, even for great yogis like Visvamitra. A grhastha is saved, however, because of his faithful wife. Sex life is the cause of material bondage, and therefore it is prohibited in three asramas and is allowed only in the grhasthaasrama. The grhastha is responsible for producing firstquality brahmacaris, vanaprasthas and sannyasis.

 

So family life is not condemned. But if a man forgets his spiritual identity and simply becomes entangled in material affairs, then he is lost. His life's mission is lost. If one thinks, "I cannot protect myself from the attack of maya," then let him be married. That is prescribed. We don't have illicit sex life. If you want a girl, if you want a boy, get married. Live in Krsna consciousness.

 

When a person is devoid of devotional service, or visnubhakti, he takes to many sinful activities. King Puranjana left home, neglected his own wife and engaged himself in killing animals. This is the position of all materialistic men. They do not care for a married chaste wife. They take the wife only as an instrument for sense enjoyment, not as a means for devotional service. To have unrestricted sex life, the karmis work very hard. They have concluded that the best course is to have sex with any woman and simply pay the price for her, as though she were a mercantile commodity. Thus they engage their energy in working very hard for such material acquisitions. Such materialistic people have lost their good intelligence. They must search out their intelligence within the heart. A person who does not have a chaste wife accepted by religious principles always has a bewildered intelligence